As Ever Still (Lee Hong-Ki) in You're Beautiful

It wasn't supposed to be love
It was never supposed to be
I fooled myself many times before, but my heart keeps on calling you
Before i tried to run away
I tried to push a step away
But even then you were growing bigger inside me

I must love you this much
I must wait for you this much
No matter how much it hurts, my heart can't leave you
There must be one love
My heart won't change
The love I protected for you, now I can tell you everything

Your warm eye expression
Your warm love
You are growing bigger inside me

You must have loved me
You must have waited for me
No matter how much I made you hurt, your heart can't leave me

There must be one love
My heart won't change
The love I protected for you, now I can tell you everything
I love you

Sometimes love, or tears will cause problems for us
I love you, I love you I just need you next to me

I must still love you
I must be waiting for you
I could fool my mind, but not my heart

There must be one love
My heart won't change
The love I protected for you, now I can tell you everything
I love you

(Ahh... Saranghe)

Not So Random..

If you miss me, why don't you say so? I know description of feeling can be cheapen by words, but there's other way to tell me.

**fighting mode: studying Environmental Microbiology -___-

Fatigue -___-

I hate it when I'm tired I can't do things perfectly.
I'm not the smartest person in RIT, but I'm positive that I'm not stupid.
I'm not the fastest person in doing something, in fact I'm among the slowest.
I'm not the one who knows everything, but I try my best not to ignore any single detail.


After analyzing myself, I think it's possible for me to be successful if I'm smart enough to come out with a plan. I know I'm still lacking confidence and determination.

Lack of confidence: Sometimes, I think I don't deserve to be the best eventhough I know there's a possibility for that. It's like it's hard for me to get out from my comfort zone.

Lack of determination: That's the first thing I said earlier, when I'm tired or nervous (e.g: when answered Gene Regeulation and Micro Viral Genetics questions) it's hard to push myself to do things perfectly. Sometimes, I think I can't push really hard for myself, but I can push myself for other people (the ones I love). I have to admit that I'm not selfish at all, I always think for other people before myself; I think it's stupid of me to do things for them and I didn't get the same things in return. But I can't help it, I feel good when I did something good for others.

**Note: There're people who also help me in the past, I could find myself again and I thank God for that.

For some reason, I feel I need to rationalize myself to overcome these boundaries. I must believe that I can excel in anything I want to do.